erinbwsmileRecently a teenager reached out to me and told me she was a professional screw up.

“Every time I have something good I ruin it. I’m seventeen years old and all I know how to do is screw things up…. How can there be hope for someone like me?”

This is part of what I have shared with her:

What we believe about ourselves matters. My whole life growing up I believed I was unworthy of love, and nothing about myself was good enough. I could never just accept or sit in any moment nor could I believe or accept anyone as actually caring about me. Those beliefs about myself kept me stuck for a very long time. It was not until I was willing to first think about and talk about changing them those thoughts and then actually beginning to change them then did I begin to treat myself with the love and respect that I deserved.

That being said: You are NOT a professional screw up and there is SO MUCH hope for you.

At seventeen years old this is the only life you’ve ever known but in the grand scheme of things it’s only going to be a portion of your experience. All you know right now is the seventeen years you have already experienced but you still have X amount of years head of you starting right this moment. It’s not all going to be peaches and creme actually with what your facing it’s going to be down right difficult but you have choices (and you’re already making them – you reached out to me).

You screwed up. We all screw up. I’ve screwed up so many times I can’t even recall them (they all run together into some pretty dark years), and I still screw up – but that isn’t your identity and there is ALWAYS hope. I don’t believe in hopeless.

If there is something as a professional-screw up I think we all could add it to our resume because we all screw up. You facing immense challenges and difficult circumstances are not a screw up you are a survivor; you are a warrior.